Skim the youngest and hippest off the top of San Francisco's young hip populace. Sprinkle the confection with a few drag queens and plunk the punk-rock band Pansy Division right down in the middle. There you will have conjured the crowd at the opening night of Midnight Mass - a summer series of midnight films in its third year at the Bridge Theater on Geary St.         

Hosted by the beautiful and disarming Peaches Christ, the series is a romp through some of the worst, and thus best, movies of all time. Peaches has graciously arranged themed entertainment before each of her 9 showings. The cinematic choice for opening night was Beyond the Valley of the Dolls, a campy story about an all-girl rock group called the "Carrie Nations", who are just tryin' to stay groovy in sixties era L.A. It was accompanied by a brief pre-show concert by Pansy Division, who doubled as the Carrie Nations for three songs.     

Beyond the Valley of the Dolls was written by a young Roger Ebert and directed by his pal, Russ Meyer in the early seventies. The film is a potpourri of elements: part Scooby Doo style mystery, part Shakespearean tragedy, part soft porn, part Brady Bunch morality, and part Hollywood spoof. It's admittedly hard to conceptualize. Ebert has said that he suspected even the actors didn't know what to make of it. Director Russ Meyer reportedly kept the actors in the dark about the fact that the film was a comedy, in order to keep their performances pure. He worried that if the actors knew it was a comedy, it wouldn't have been so funny. His tactic was successful. The characters' doe-eyed innocence throughout the film makes the hackneyed plot all the more ridiculous.

The important thing to remember about this movie is to make fun of it. This is something our hostess Peaches and her audience have not forgotten. "You're a groovy boy - I'd like to strap you on sometime," and "The cat swore it was Acapulco gold!" are just two of the lines that demand crowd participation. A film which offers gems of exchange like these cannot go un-mocked, nor un-celebrated.

It's not too late to get in on the action at Midnight Mass. You can try shouting about sex and drugs at the Kabuki, but it may not go down so well. Upcoming showings in the 9 week series include Showgirls, Suspiria, Hairspray, The Honeymoon Killers, Dead Alive, Mommie Dearest, Faster, Pussycat! Kill! Kill!, and Hard Candy in 3D. It's just good family fun, as evidenced by the pre-show mother/daughter mud wrestling competition, for the film, Mommie Dearest. Other ambitious pre-show fare will involve a drag queen roller derby, spaghetti speed eating and more.

Visit the official Midnight Mass website or call (415) 751-3213 for showtimes.

  

Future shows: 2000 Schedule ______________________________ 6/10 Beyond the Valley of the Dolls 6/17 Showgirls 6/24 Suspiria 7/1 Hairspray 7/8 The Honeymoon Killers 7/15 Dead Alive 7/22 Mommie Dearest 7/29 Faster, Pussycat! Kill! Kill! 8/5 The Lollipop Girls in Hard Candy

Midnight Mass at The Bridge Movie Theater 3010 Geary at Blake $5